Sinner's Hand
by Alcatrazzie
Summary: Come on darling, Won't you shake this poor sinner's hand?
1. Prologue

There were two things wrong with this situation and one of them started with his pants moving around and around on the foreign ceiling fan he knew for sure was not a part of his room.

For one crazy minute, Zoro thought he may be dreaming, but the groan to his left and the leg wrapping more securely over his abdomen were very much real and nowhere near a dream.

And that was his second problem.

Let's back track here to twenty-four hours beforehand. It was November 11th, a nice, peaceful autumn day where the slight smell of snow filled the air and scarves were a nice decorative feature for the daily commuters.

This happened to be Zoro's twenty-third birthday.

And so far traveling to the Red-Light District to come to some second rate bar to get slap-happy drunk was not the way he wanted to spend it.

However, it was the perfect way Johnny and Yosaku wanted to spend it; red in the face and giddily doing some made up jig to the bar's radio, the crowd jeering them on as they went around in circles with their arms locked and beer splashing everywhere.

Zoro sniffed his own beer before taking a sip. He promptly spat it back into the cup, making a face as he did so. How Johnny and Yosaku downed this stuff stumped him. If he ever had the disadvantage of tasting cat pee this was what it'd probably taste like. God, they did actually manage to find the worst bar in this strip!

Maybe since it was a 'special occasion' as they put it when they dragged Zoro from work, they were drinking so much, despite the taste. And with being low on cash at the time, the cheapest place possible too.

Zoro gave a mournful sigh as he tried to down the golden liquid. Better not let it go to waste if they were treating him. It would be downright disrespectful.

Like how this beer was downright disrespectful! Uggg! That was a bad idea, and he was pretty sure that his stomach would feel the pain later that night cast over a toilet.

There was a strong laugh to side, full of jeer and amusement that he was pretty sure was casted at him.

"That's a funny face you're making!" The voice jested. "Do some more!"

Not amused, Zoro pivoted around in his bar stool to get a better look to the person at his right. Instead of some bulky drunkard he came face to face with a kid. Or, at least a baby-faced man who had enough sense to be drinking a roman coke.

Zoro licked very dry lips. "Sorry kid, but that's all I've got."

The smile was still plastered on his face, nonetheless, as he shifted his stool around, giving Zoro a better view. This kid was scrawny; maybe he had a bit of muscle on him, but not much. Medium height, maybe a few inches shorter than him; round face and a head full of raven black hair stuffed under a scruffy, worn straw hat.

To put it simply, if Zoro was a bartender he'd have kicked this kid out before even looking for ID. So, he didn't really find it all that impolite to outright ask him. "Kid, how old are you?"

"Hmmm?" His current attention was on Johnny and Yosaku, who were currently doing the can-can on the tables, much to the enjoyment of everyone besides the barkeep. Zoro hoped for a heavy hangover and a long recovery for them in the morning.

"How old are you?" He asked again.

"Oh! 20!" He chewed down on the straw, taking a small swig from the cups contents. "But I've been coming here for at least three years now!"

Zoro coughed up his drink at the precise moment Johnny did a particularly skilled flip from the table. The boy laughed and clapped his hands along with everyone else.

Besides the barkeep, who was looking more intently to the states of his tables rather than the nifty acrobatics of someone very close to getting kicked out, not matter how good the entertainment was.

Zoro looked from the kid to the bartender than back to the kid again before making one last eye motion to the bartender who, Zoro noticed, was keeping a very keen on him rather than the boy beside him. Zoro glared right back when the kid suddenly stuck out his hand to him.

"Luffy," he said simply, an impish smile played on his lips.

Zoro humbly returned the handshake, if only to break that stare of the bartender who seemed to take this as a peace offering and went back to cleaning glasses. "Zoro."

Luffy nodded, taking his hand away. "I know! I came over here to say Happy Birthday!"

"Excuse me?"

Luffy chuckled. "Your funny friend over there keep singing happy birthday Zoro so I asked who you were. Weird how you're all the way over here and not joining them! They're pretty fun!"

Fun my ass, Zoro thought mournfully. Take him out to the dirtiest part of town to get a second rate beer while he's left alone at a bar stool while they sing the hokey-pokey or whatever nonsense they were sputtering while drunk. Happy-fucking-birthday indeed.

Luffy noticed this little thought ramble, well, more or less noticed Zoro's eyebrows getting closer and closer together, making death glares at what he hoped wasn't Ralph. Last time Ralph or the barkeeper as Zoro knew him, got glared at….let's just say the chairs needed replaced anyways.

"You don't seem happy about it."

"Happy?" Zoro barked. It was drowned out by a well-timed '_yarg!_' as the bar chorused another song brought to you by two rather lovely, soon to be hung over, and left out to dry in the city gutters, duo. "Yes, I'm so happy that I was taken from a night off to go gallivanting around town to a bar with cat-piss beer," There was a high snort to his left that he didn't bother to pay attention too. "And left to my own devises while my two dull-headed so called 'friends' decide to be entertainers as I celebrate my birthday by myself! Yes, I'm really _fucking_ happy!"

There was a pregnant pause as Luffy took that all in. "Oh great; I thought you having a bad time at first."

"That was sarcasm, you moron!"

"Hey, I didn't know!" Luffy pouted, chewing on his straw as rum and coke slipped off the bottom and onto his jeans. "You could have been serious."

"I think you need to take a course in people skills, kid." Taking the last swig of his beer, Zoro propped back and sighed.

"I told you my name's Luffy! So stop calling me kid!"

"My birthday, I can call you whatever I want." He really didn't mean picking on the kid, but it was late, everyone was drunk besides him and this little nuisance, and all he wanted to do was just head home and spend his birthday like he did the rest; alone. But for some outlandish reason he couldn't leave Johnny and Yosaku to their own demises, no matter how old they were.

And it would kind of be a big slap in the face if he left when they invited him out to have some fun, even if they were crazy drunk and dancing on bar tables that he was surely not paying for if they broke in half. He made a note to tell the bartender that if wood looked like it was about to splinter.

"Well, if you're not having fun down here, why not come with me?"

Zoro wasn't sure if he heard correctly. Even if he did, he wasn't sure if he wanted to hear that correctly. Was he? No! Couldn't be! The kid was younger than him by two years! And he didn't look to be the kind to take people off the street anyways!

Even if this was the red-light district, it was the very far ends of it. Not everyone was _those_ types of people.

But still, Zoro couldn't help but stare and unconsciously say, "What?"

Luffy laughed, sweet and low and maybe, just maybe, Zoro was a bit wrong about him.

"My friend has good rum upstairs. We keep it for special occasions. I was just thinking that maybe if you weren't having fun down here you'd come up and have a drink?"

Zoro opened and closed his mouth repeatedly. He was started to look like a fish out of water, begging for relief. Some sweat, fresh air that would take away this suffocating feeling he just got.

He wanted to say no, he wasn't interested, he wasn't like that, but looking into Luffy's dark eyes, innocent and trustworthy, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea.

The drink he meant. Most definitely the drink! If it came down to having something other than this so called beer and it didn't cost him anything he was rather okay with it. He glanced over to Johnny and Yosaku and was relieved to see they were off the tables, but still singing madly like a bunch of banshee's.

They would be fine for a few drinks.

"Rum sounds good, but if you have any Sake, that might make things a bit better."

8

Sake did make things a lot better. It made Zoro smile the first time that night, and Luffy's company didn't seem half bad. He was actually enjoying the kid. In the end, it was a huge improvement from the lonely barstool that he sat at for two hours with a lukewarm beer.

Maybe going for a good drink wasn't that bad of an idea.

"…And then suddenly this _big_ fish flies off my rod and somehow manages to bit down on Ace's head!" Luffy was acting out very enthusiastically a story of a fishing trip with him and his brother when they were younger, mimicking the movements he made when swinging this fish out of the river and onto this brothers head by mistake. Zoro basked at the energy and livelihood of this young man. How much he laughed and smiled and didn't seem to give a care that a strange man that he met that night was sitting on his couch drinking his alcohol while telling personal stories of his childhood.

It was a mix between brave and stupid and maybe just a bit too trustworthy, but Zoro had him all wrong. Luffy wasn't that bad a person, and previous thoughts about wrong doings left his mind. Right now enjoying good stories with a good drink in his hand was a pretty good way to spend the rest of the night.

He almost forgot that he rather liked spending time with people if they weren't being jerkoff's.

It was one of the reasons he didn't have very many friends, and the only reason why he let Johnny and Yosaku tug him every which way when they wanted to hang out.

They were two idiots, but they were good people and someone you could trust when you needed them. They kept Zoro together through a lot of hard times, and if it weren't for them he really would have been alone. To him, they were his only real friends that he had in a long time.

But Luffy had this aurora about him that sent away doubt and mistrust. It made Zoro believe that if he stayed near him long enough they would end up having a bond that would never break.

It made him a bit sad to think that this would be the only time the two would talk. Tomorrow he would find himself in his apartment, bits and piece of tonight scattered across his brain as he got ready for the day ahead. Even if he wanted to stay in touch, he was pretty sure that it wouldn't be the same thing without a bit of alcohol in their system.

Besides, he would end up forgetting about half of this in a weeks' time anyhow.

And Zoro was surprised to find that he was a bit sad with that.

"So, having a better time now?"

Zoro smiled, sipping his sake. It warmed him going down his throat. "A lot better. I had you wrong."

"Had me wrong?" Luffy cocked his head, unsure of what Zoro meant. He was perched on the side of the couch, a mere foot away from Zoro who was looking at little red in the face.

That in itself was a surprise, but Luffy only met him tonight. If he knew Zoro a bit longer, he would know that seeing him red in the face was an achievement not won by many.

Zoro was either not feeling quite well, or this was really good saké.

Zoro downed what was left in his glass and snorted. It was turning out to be very good saké. "You know. When you asked me up here I thought you were asking me for something besides a drink."

Luffy cocked his head more to the left, still not sure where Zoro was going with this. He continued on, disregarding Luffy's quizzing looks. "Good to know you aren't one of them. But you had me going there for a minute though."

"One of _them_?"

"I have to admit, you had be going for a second there."

Luffy gave a light chuckle, moving off the edge of the couch and more near Zoro. Zoro didn't seem to be paying attention as he filled up his glass again. What could have been equal to three shots in that glass alone Zoro downed it like water. Luffy eyed him curiously, opting for him to continue in whatever ramble the man was going on about in his semi drunken state.

"Going? Going for what?"

This time Zoro gave a light chuckle. His body was warm with booze and he felt more relaxed than he had in weeks. Actually, it was getting a little too warm in the room. Unbuttoning his shit halfway, giving him some relief, he slid his head back and closed his eyes.

"I guess you're more innocent that I thought. I'm saying I thought you were a hooker."

There was a long pause after he said that. So long that Zoro had to lift his head (albeit it took a few times with how heavy it felt) to see if Luffy was still in the room.

He was alright. And he was very close. A lot closer than he was just a few minutes ago. Now the boy was just a few inches away from Zoro's face, feeling his hot breath against his flushed cheeks as they stared eye to eye with another.

"Sorry….I didn't mean that…."

He was cut off when Luffy shook his head. He inched closer.

"So you thought I was a hooker? You mean a prostitute, right?"

"Sorry. But you can't blame me when we're in this part of town."

"Did you want one?"

Zoro blinked.

"What?"

"Did you want a prostitute?"

Zoro blinked again, feeling a little woozy."

"No."

"Why'd you guys come to the red-light district then?"

Zoro was feeling more than a little woozy now. His head felt like a hot air balloon ready for flight. Something inside him stirred.

He didn't decide if it was good or bad yet.

"I…to get cheap beer."

No. That wasn't the reason. If they wanted cheap beer they would have gone down to their regular drinking place and had a couple pints for half price.

Now that he thought about it, Johnny did say something about getting him laid and maybe take away all this stress he was building up.

Try not to send him to an early grave, they joked.

Zoro gulped, but his throat was too dry.

"Maybe we all just tried to get lucky tonight." He admitted. That sounded about right. The reason he was so stressed out. It wasn't because of lousy beer and being left alone at a bar stool for half the night by Johnny and Yosaku.

No.

It was being left alone at a bar stool half the night after not getting one person to come up to him and maybe offer him something for troubles.

"Is that what you want?"

Zoro blinked once more only because Luffy was just inches away from his face; his lips.

Zoro was tipsy. He was tired. It was his birthday and he wanted to spend it just like the rest; alone.

But disregarding all that, his glass dropped and rolled to the floor as soft lips touched his, becoming more and more heated as they crammed into one another; tongues licked, teeth nipping, pulling, suckling as shirts were flown and tensions were high.

The last thing he remembered after taking off his shirt was how relaxed he felt about this.

That was till he woke up the next morning feeling crusty, sore, and not sure if he should panic or not as Luffy gave a wide yawn, snuggling deeper into Zoro's bare backside.

Zoro wasn't tipsy anymore. He wasn't the least bit tired. It was the day after his twenty-third birthday and he was screwed.


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: One Piece and any of its characters are not owned by me. **

**Author's Notes: **Firstly I just want to thank everyone who reviewed so far. I love the positive feedback you all gave me, it really helped with me wanting to continue writing this fic. Sadly this might be my last update for a little while as I am a college student and classes start up in less than a week. But still, thank again to all who reviewed and follow this story. It made my heart soar!

Also, as many have asked about Luffy and everything, well be assured that was the prologue and all your questions will be answered here.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

Zoro's head was spinning; a bit fast actually. If it didn't slow down soon he was sure he was either going to pass out or, well he didn't want the alternative so he tried to settle his mind as best he could. Which was really, really hard to do considering he slept with a hooker!

Let's repeat that.

Slept. With. A. Hooker.

Zoro groaned, slamming his head against the backboard making a load thud in the process. He quickly looked over at the sleeping bundle next to him who , he was satisfied to find, was still sawing logs and snoring; loudly. God this kid has a pair of lungs on him!

He needed to get out of here and fast.

Slithering out of bed as best he could, he removed the covers and slowly reached one leg over the edge before letting out a small yelp of surprise when impossibly long arms reached around his abdomen, pulling him closer.

Luffy was still asleep somehow, but his grip was like iron, making Zoro resort to countless years of kendo and weight training to pry them off of him. Whoever this kid was, he was sure a mystery, being hooker by night and wrestler by day.

It was going to be a challenge, but he needed to swap his body for something else, or Luffy would be sure to wake up to him skipping out of here, never to see him again.

Thinking quickly, Zoro took his pillow, taking care to not move much when he had to make the switch. Lifting Luffy's right arm carefully, he smoothly guided the pillow between them, rolling out of the way when the kid took the bait, his arms grabbing the pillow, snuggling into without breaking stride in his snoring.

Zoro let out a sigh of relief, rolling out of bed and quietly onto the floor, which went to problem number three.

His clothes were everywhere, thrown across the floor and on furniture. He remembered his pants were still hanging on the ceiling fan and there was no way in hell he was going to jump on that bed and get them. Even if they were good pants, he didn't have anything in them. His belongings were either on the bedside table or in his jacket, which was fine with him.

Luckily his coat was on the chair next to his shirt. Maybe his luck was changing this morning, but he still needed pants or something. He was fairly certain that running around in boxer shorts in winter in the Red Light District at, he looked to his at the alarm clock to his right, six a.m. was not the smartest of things to be doing.

And he's done quite a few stupid things in the past twenty four hours.

Righting himself, he made a hasty grab for whatever he could find that could cover his bottom. Hands fell on what could be considered jeans.

He didn't really care, and pulling them on they seemed the best he could come up with albeit a bit tight. Stealing a pair of jeans was not going to be the cause of distraught after the night he'd been in. Luffy could have his ceiling fan jeans, maybe something to compensate for the bill he was never going to pay.

Hell, he didn't even know if he got charged! All he remembered was wrestling each other into bed and searching somewhere for a condom.

He was surprised that he really wanted to remember more. However last night went, this was the first time in a long while that Zoro actually felt somewhat relaxed.

Well, body wise. Mentally he was a wreck, and when reaching for his coat he accidentally picked it up upside down, spilling out money, wallet, and his cell.

Luffy muttered something incoherently. Zoro froze like a deer in headlights, biting his lip as he watched the boy sleepily rub his eyes as he sat up in the bed. Zoro carefully watched him, waiting for him to look over at Zoro's getaway. A few seconds passed though when Luffy yawned and fell back into bed, moving onto his side away from Zoro and quickly went back to sleep.

Luck had to be on Zoro's side that morning because that would had never have happened otherwise.

Feeling around on the floor for his things, Zoro's eyes never left the boys back. Hastily he grabbed his three things, stuffing them into his pocket without a second glance.

He backed slowly to the door, and upon reaching the knob took one last look at the sleeping boy and bolted out of there, leaving Luffy to an empty room to wake up to.

8

An hour and half later Zoro made it back to his apartment, dead tired and sporting the on comings of a hangover. He would have been home a lot sooner, but who knew that finding a cab at six in the morning would be that complicated? It took at least a dozen times to find one, much less tail one down.

He didn't really much care right now. He slumped down onto his couch, closing his eyes and hoping for sleep before the killer headache reached its peak.

The more he lay there, the more that sleep avoided him. His head was still swimming, going over the events from this morning and back to last night. He tried to focus on what went on last night after Luffy kissed him. He could still feel his amazingly soft lips against his, moving more and more rapidly the longer the kissed.

It was a nice sensation, something that calmed him as his heart still raced after waking up in bed in his birthday suit.

Well, this proved to be something in the long run. He was actually gay. Johnny and Yosaku would have a field day once they learned about this. They were telling him for years that the reason he never had a girl was because he had an attraction for the same gender. He shrugged it off as nothing but being uninterested in dating anyone and that work was more important.

Well, turns out that maybe they were right.

Or maybe it was just the one. Hell he didn't know for sure! Sexuality aside all he knew that Luffy's body against his own felt right somehow, like it belonged against him as he lightly kissed him top to bottom tracing his tongue around tender areas as Luffy moaned for more.

Slowly felt his mind ease up, bits and pieces of last night coming back to him finally. It wasn't the whole ordeal, but it was enough to give him a pretty good idea that last night was probably going to be the best sex he'll ever have in a long, long time.

Luffy's scratches from last night were starting to sting on his back the more he lay on them, but he was too damn tired to give a shit now.

As he slowly drifted off to sleep, he couldn't help but wonder how Luffy reacted to waking up alone.

8

There was an irritating ringing in his ears, and it was not the hangover. Zoro groaned, reaching for the cell in his jacket pocket. Grumbling something that sounded like a curse under his breath, he wished it was one of the two knuckleheads calling so he could chew them out.

Picking up he was surprised to find someone else on the line. His eyes got big as saucers when he found out who it was.

"Hey, this is Zoro, right? Remember me? It's Luffy!"

Zoro sprang into a sitting position, abusing the couch springs as he did so. His mouth was very dry and he was still in the process of waking up. He must have took a while because Luffy spoke up again. "Hey, you okay Zoro? Nothing wrong?"

What do you mean 'nothing wrong'? I just left you by yourself after a one night stand! His mind jarred warily as he rubbed his eyes. "How'd you get my number?" He asked, not caring if he was rude or what. It was a night one stand for a reason and that reason was not took hook up for another night of banging.

"What'd you mean? You're the one that has my phone!"

Zoro blinked. He looked down at the cell in hand, and for the first time noticed that the slick droid was, indeed, not his phone.

Well shit.

"You must have grabbed mine when you were leaving this morning. Sorry, I would have called earlier but I just woke up."

Zoro's mind was still in a heavy fog, so he still wasn't quite getting where Luffy was getting at. Yes, he had his phone, but how did he get his number?

"But how did you get this number?"

"Did you just wake up too?" Luffy moaned. "I _said_ you have _my_ phone! Of course I know my own number, I'm not an idiot! I figured you might want yours back too, so if it's no trouble think you can meet me?"

Zoro mumbled something, sitting up a bit more on the couch till he reached a pen and paper on the end table. "Yeah sure, where at?"

"Um, do you know Miller's? The bar you were at last night? I can't get out of my morning shift so maybe you can drop it off? The place I work at is a few blocks past Miller's."

Zoro nodded, writing it down. "Yeah, sure. What's the name of the place? Hmmm? M'kay. In an hour? Sure, I'll be there."

He hung up the phone, staring into space shortly after.

Well shit.

8

It took four hours and a stop for directions for Zoro to get to the right place. A few blocks his ass! Zoro spent the good portion of the morning and most of the afternoon looking for this so called place Luffy worked at. He followed the directions and still he must have went about ten or twenty blocks from Miller's before asking for directions from a flower shop owner who blushed at the mention of the place, but nonetheless sent him in the right direction.

She must have not been right in the head either since he still managed to get there an hour later. Look for the large purple and pink house with a gate in front. Despite this morning's misgivings, it didn't take long for Zoro to spot the flamboyant colors and elegant, or lack of a better word, sign above it: House Okama.

It was….an Okama house alright. The first he's ever seen one, and hopefully his last. It was an older looking house, four or five stories with a wrought iron fence that led up cobbled steps to an arch doorway. This house must have been around since the early 1900's, maybe even before the war. It looked like it was once owned by upper-class people before the town went to the pits. Probably one of the very few houses left standing when everything was bought out to make way for hotels and bars.

Whoever owned this place must be loaded to keep it in this kind of shape.

Or business was very, very good.

Zoro tried to cast that out of his mind as he made the long journey up the steps to the doorway. Everything about this place was old fashioned, even to the doorbell that was nothing more than silver buzzer that rang the rusted bell as he pressed it.

He could hear the chime go through the whole house like an echo, reaching all the way to the top before stopping, leaving the air silent and still as he stood there awkwardly.

It was a few minutes of moving back and forth on his toes before someone answered the door. The images of an Okama with caked on make-up and a horrible wig popped into his mind. It was something that he really didn't want to see, and really didn't think was up his alley, despite who he slept with the night before.

Who answered the door was very much the opposite and very much not Okama-like. A blonde man with a goatee and dressed up like he was some sort of Yakuza member greeted him; suave and gentlemanly like.

Almost like he was greeting a customer.

Zoro picked up the thought and sent it soaring into the darkest pits of his brain, never to return. He never even paid for the one last night; there was no way in hell he was going to pay for one now, despite the awkward arrangement he was in now.

The Yakuza-looking guy eyed him up and down before snorting in a displeasing way. Zoro glared, getting the feeling that this guy didn't like him from the tips of his boots to the green spikes of his hair. The feeling was mutual. "Sorry buddy, but you got the wrong place. Bar's four blocks that way."

Zoro bit back a growl, trying to act somewhat civilized so he could get out of here quickly. "No, sorry, but I think I got the right place. House Okama?"

The blonde raised a very curly eyebrow, giving way another snort. "Well then, right place wrong time. Come back in the next few hours, the hosts will be ready by then."

He was getting ready to close the door when Zoro stuck his foot in, making a small opening for them to speak in. "Okay, if you let me talk maybe you can solve both our problems and I can get out of here and you can…do whatever you do."

The door squeezed tighter on his foot, sending ripples of pain up his leg. He glared at the blonde, but didn't budge. "I'm looking for a guy named Luffy. He told me to meet him here."

This got the blonde's attention as he opened the door the full way, giving sweet relief to Zoro's now aching foot.

"So you're Zoro, huh? Where the hell have you been? We've been expecting you hours ago!"

Zoro shrugged, taking the open door as an invitation to come in, much to the blonde's charging. "Sorry, got lost. Now where's Luffy at?"

"God, you're a rude one. He's still in the kitchen, but I don't think a few minutes break will hurt any. Go sit in the tea room your right, he'll be out."

With that, the blonde turned on his heel and marched out down the hall and out of sight. Zoro craned his neck to see where he went, but the hallway cut off to another and there was no telling which way the swirly eyebrow guy went off too. He took the offer to wait in the tea room, which he figured was this little room to his left.

8

Sanji padded into the kitchen with stiff shoulders and a slouch in his posture. Luffy looked over curiously while carefully drying a dish. He broke about three that week, and anymore would lead to more trouble than he was already in. Sanji was particularly not happy with him that morning, stressing him out any farther would lead to a huge fight and more than three broken dishes, despite this being his kitchen and all.

"Ah, Sanji, you're still not mad are you?" He asked, grabbing another plate. It was swiftly kicked out of his grasp by the black blur of Sanji's dress pants. The plate landed delicately in Sanji's hand, placed like a fragile flower on the counter before he took Luffy by the collar, slamming him into the sink.

Luffy flinched, but more to Sanji's glare than pain. He was expecting this kind of confrontation, but not before the dinner rush when everyone galloped down into hall to eat their hearts out of Sanji's cuisine before work.

And definitely not in the kitchen. Sanji would die first before blood even dare touch his floors.

Luffy sighed wryly, knowing what had to be said. He was an idiot most of the time, but he knew the right things to say in situations concerning Sanji (and most of the time food. Actually, it was always food, but that wasn't the point) and now was one of those times.

"Come on Sanji, you can't baby me forever." He felt Sanji's hands tense around his collar more, his glare turning darker his lips mere inches from Luffy's face.

"Babying you is not the problem here, Luf. The problem here is that you slept with some strange shithead!"

Luffy gave a glare of his own, though not as powerful as Sanji's. "It's none of your business who I sleep with! You sleep with people all the time!"

"That's only when I need the money!" He pushed off, making Luffy stumble backward into the sink. He watched quietly as Sanji paced around the island. "And I don't think you need extra cash unless you want something really big that isn't that fancy beef we saw at the butchers last week!"

"You don't know that!"

Sanji's snort could be heard all the way upstairs, and even the ones still asleep could pass it off as disbelief. "Yeah, yeah you're the only always going on and on about everything that fascinates you till the wee hours of the morning. You even told me about Ace's insect collection he started when he was five! Luffy, I know everything that goes on in that little mind of yours and needed extra money is not one of them!"

Luffy crossed his arms in an almost defiant way, cocking his head. "Yeah? Then tell me why I slept with someone last night?"

Sanji opened his mouth and promptly closed it not two seconds later. It was hard to admit, but Luffy was right about one thing. One. Not all of it and absolutely not all the time. He had spur of the moments of being right and even less than that of causing Sanji to be reigned speechless.

It just happened to be a long day with too much food to prepare in such little time. Lighting his next cigarette in what can be regarded as throwing in the white flag.

"Forget it for now," He mumbled, placing a tea kettle on the heated burner. "That shithead you slept with last night is in the tea room with your phone. Be quick about it!"

Luffy almost broke his fourth plate of the week if it wasn't for a sink full of water taking the blow. He stripped off his apron, taking a full sprint for the door. "Thanks Sanji!"

Sanji sighed as the door swung back and forth.

8

This wasn't as much as a tea room as Zoro expected it to be. Actually, it was more like a green room than a tea room, why with all the long tables filled with different types of vegetable and fruit plants lined up like soldiers, taking in the sunlight gratefully.

That stupid swirly-brow pointed him to the wrong room! Damn he knew he shouldn't have trusted the bastard! The house was too large to wonder around looking for him now, so despite him wanting to go out into the hall and wait, Zoro stayed put. He wondered up and down the aisle of plants, looking to each one.

By the time he got to the fourth variety of peppers and the temptation of trying a vibrant red one to see how spicy it was he was interrupted by the sound of feet pounding on the wood flooring, giving him a start.

He headed back to the doorway and stopped.

Luffy was standing there, looking around before finally spotting him. Zoro's heart was pounding uncontrollably.

He hated it. It was stupid at how suddenly all these pheromones and hormones and whatever was left to the human body and all that. He slept with the guy once and suddenly his whole body is aching for the touch and feel of warm hands against him again.

He didn't like it. Rather, he very much wanted it to stop, either by a cold shower or to throw himself into the icy river a mile back.

Luffy smiled though, full teeth and as bright as the sun. "Hey Zoro! How come you're in here? Sanji said you were in the tea room."

Zoro rubbed the back of his head, avoiding the boys' eyes. "The asshole gave me the wrong directions…uh, here's your phone back." He tossed the phone which Luffy had to work for, jumping to the side to cup it with both hands.

"Hey thanks. Oh," He dug into his back pocket, producing Zoro's as he, with less grace than Zoro, which he couldn't wrap his head around as the kids aim was worse than his, making him almost dive for his phone before it crashed to the floor.

"Opps, sorry!"

There was a small dent when Zoro picked it up, but nothing too horribly traumatic. At least nothing he was bound to do anyways.

Luffy looked sorry, pushing his hands in his pockets guiltily. "Do you need me to pay for damages?"

"Nah," Zoro reassured. "Not like the screen's cracked or anything."

"Aw man! The screen's cracked?"

"Didn't I just say it wasn't?"

"Ah, sorry."

An awkward silence followed soon after, leaving the two with nothing to do but stare at slightly dried-out plants.

"Nice greenhouse." Zoro muttered solemnly.

Luffy perked up. "Yeah! Isn't it great? Bon-chan set it up for us! Sanji was complaining about the price of vegetables so we started this a few years ago!"

"Yeah," Meekly, he poked one of the plants for lack of a better thing to do. A lone pepper dropped from the unexpected disturbance, right at the same time Sanji appeared in the room.

"Hey asshole! Quit messing with the food before I chop that hand of yours off!"

"Sanji!"

"Got a problem with me poking a plant?"

Sanji handed the tea tray to Luffy, rolling up his sleeves as he stomped up to the green-haired nuisance. "I got problems with you being here, moss-head!"

"Moss-head! Who the fuck are you calling 'moss-head', curly brow?"

"You, shithead!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Is that the best comeback you can come up with? Sheesh, not only are you rude, you're rude and stupid!"

The argument got even more heated as insult after insult was thrown back and forth. It was like a tennis match as Luffy, still holding the tray, looked from left to right then left again as the two were head to head, pushing each other backward and forward, looking for dominance in this crazy little house.

"Oi! V'at is this? A mating ritual?" Luffy turned, smile turning upward, though it was in a slight nervous twitch as if his grandfather was visiting and would soon have him halfway across the room and somehow in a half nelson.

"Ah, Iva-chan."

Sanji stopped suddenly, sputtering nonsense while Zoro nearly lost balance. "Sanji-boy! We won't keep customers if you keep picking fights with them!"

A large, bulky blue haired Okama was soon by Zoro's side, steadying him from the shoulders with amazingly gentle hands for someone his size.

"So sorry, my boy here doesn't know how to treat some men right. V'at will you like? I'm afraid most of my other boys are still asleep, or out somewhere but if you like to wait and have tea and cake we can arrange…."

"Sorry," Zoro said, cutting him off. He pulled himself away, managing to make it somewhere near the entrance. "I'm not a customer. I'm just here to return Luffy's phone."

"Ah!" Ivankov's smile widened a lot, which was really scary for someone who just met him. Large and toothy, it being nowhere near as appealing as Luffy's. The mental image of meeting a heavy caked on made-up Okama from before popped into mind, and Zoro got the feeling that if this was the person who answered the door he wouldn't be in the proximity of the house whatsoever, phone or not phone.

"Friend of Luffy-boy, eh? Good, good! Stay for tea anyways then! Any friend of Luffy's deserves some pampering then! Sanji! Serve them tea!"

"Yeah, yeah," Sanji muttered, yanking the tea platter out of Luffy's hands. Ivankov followed him out, leaving Luffy and Zoro to follow suit. Luffy gave him comforting smile as he led the way, guiding Zoro to the actual tea room right across the hall.

Ah. So this is where it was. Why couldn't the cook get over himself and just tell him that.

The room was surprising as bright as the green room but with circular tables engulfing the majority of the room. There were paintings hung everywhere, mock or real deals of several masterpieces, sculptures and ceramic wall decorations covered where the paints could not, and right on the far end was a large fireplace, giving the room a homey glow.

But what got Zoro was a Baby-grand that sat close to the fireplace, shining brightly next to the open flame. Something told him this was the star of the tea room, making this place fairly popular.

"Like it?" Luffy asked, nothing it stare at the piano. "We're looking for a musician right now, so…."

"I'm not, if that's what you're asking." He took the seat Ivankov offered him, Luffy taking the seat across. "I'm more into swords."

"Ah! A swordsman! Are you a blacksmith then?"

He ignored Sanji's timed snort, taking the cup of tea as he ignored the urge to spill it over him. "Nah, not that either. I used to belong to a dojo a long time ago and collected swords because of that."

"Wow! Zoro's amazing!" There were stars in Luffy's eyes. "Are you like a samurai or something?"

"Idiot!" Sanji smacked the empty tray against the back of his head. "Samurai's don't exist anymore!"

"Awwww," Luffy pouted, rubbing the back of his head tenderly. "He could be one if he wanted to!"

"Yeah right. What is he going to do? Go defeat evil warlords or something?"

"That'd be cool!"

"Are you really that much of a dumbass?"

Zoro's gaze settled off the two as his pocket vibrated. Crap, how many messages did he have? It'd been a good day and a half since he last touched his phone, never mind checking it. Clicking through he saw that Johnny texted, and suddenly his stomach plummeted.

Shit, another thing he screwed up with. He totally forgot he abandoned his two friends in the bar last night, leaving them drunk and carefree the floor below. They probably went home red in the face, and maybe if not a little tiffed that they were left behind while Zoro got some.

Hopefully they weren't too mad with him if they were texting him, but as Zoro scrolled through all that Johnny typed out were jumbled letters like he was just tapping the keypad in a drunken rage. But Zoro didn't get that from the text; rather than rage it looked frazzled and a bit panicked.

Fearing the worst he texted a short 'what's up'. He felt eyes peering at him. Looking up Luffy and Sanji were still arguing about something (ninja's this time, he guessed). If those two were still arguing then….

"So I heard you gave our Luffy-boy a good time out last night, eh?"

Zoro nearly jumped out of his seat. You couldn't blame him as Ivankov, with all his blue-haired glory, was mere inches away from his face, carefully leaning against the table as he did so. Damn this man was quiet! If Luffy wanted ninja's he should look to his left.

"Ah! Zoro what's wrong?"

"Nothing," He answered, trying to calm his head down.

"Well we'll just leave you two alone. Come Sanji-boy. Dinner isn't going to prepare itself!"

Sanji sighed, following the Okama-Queen out of the room, but not before coming in close to Zoro with a set glare. "Listen, you fuck around with him I'll have your dick mounted to my wall. Got it?"

Zoro's eyes narrowed. "Was that a threat?"

A Cheshire grin crept on his face before he walked away, taking a puff out of his cig. "No, more like a promise."

Luffy looked on questionably, not understanding what Sanji meant, which was better off, Zoro guessed. But after the two left there was nothing but silence as the two drank their tea. What should have been a casual drop off and a quick goodbye turned out to be a bigger hassle than just meeting up with what should have been a one-night stand.

But the more Zoro was thinking about it, this one-night stand thing was getting farther and farther away from its original meaning.

Like, didn't it go with just taking some random person up to your room with a nice bottle of lube and a condom in hand and wake up the next day to never see each other again?

He was pretty sure that having tea with your sex buddy from the night before was not how these things happened. Not unless you wanted to continue using this as an excuse for more sex and then soon turn it into friends with benefits and then all out lovers moving in with you.

Now that was being farfetched and ridiculous.

Drowning in his own thoughts, Zoro didn't hear Luffy talking.

"Sorry, what?"

"Ahhh, there we go! I thought you were falling asleep over there. I asked, if you're not a samurai, then what do you do?"

He also figured that getting to know you sex buddy was something not out of the code book either, whatever that code book was. But the kid asked a reasonable question, so it shouldn't hurt to answer.

"I'm not really anything, to tell the truth. I started working at this agency a while back. Nothing too big, we take on left over police cases here and there."

"So you're a policeman? Cool!"

Zoro shook his head. "Not really, more detective work than anything else. Nothing too special. My boss sends me out to question people and that's pretty much it. Pay's good though, so I'm not complaining."

"A detective! That's even cooler!" Stars showed up in Luffy's eyes again, becoming even more impressed with Zoro's somewhat boring job. It really wasn't even that great. Usually he's playing errand boy to that damn Hawkeye, so really he wasn't even out in the field doing crazy things like Luffy must think he did.

And speaking of which, why was he getting so worked up anyways? Shouldn't he be more awkward and shy around him? Normal people would hardly make eye contact with someone they just saw naked, much less with someone who had a night of passion with.

All in all it was weird and the total opposite of normal. Really, this whole thing was unusual! Right down to Luffy's sparkling eyes and hyperactive character!

After being left alone with Luffy, the air was becoming thick, his head filling with thoughts and questions, going back to how awkward this was. At first it was fine, but that was when Sanji and that Okama –head were here, and even if he had a growing dislike for the chef, it was better than being alone with Luffy.

Now, now everything was deafening. His thoughts were screaming at him when they finally got the chance, telling him, yelling at him for how wrong this was. How bad this is. That this situation shouldn't be happening in what was once a simple trade of phones and a goodbye, no hard feelings but I don't want to see you again, I hope you understand. Let's just go back to our normal lives and forge this ever happened.

But that wasn't the case here.

The case was much bigger.

Zoro bit his lip, feeling the heavy truth fall on his shoulders. The elephant in the room was becoming more prominent and the more he tried ignoring it, the more noticeable it got. All the way to the point where Luffy's voice was drowning out as he went on and on about how awesome he was for being a detective.

It got to the point where he couldn't take it anymore. Slamming his hands down on the table rattling the cups as Luffy suddenly stopped in his tracks, looking up at Zoro.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" Zoro all but yelled, the calmness he held onto for so long finally breaking. "What do you mean by that? Come on, don't you think it's strange to be casually having tea with someone you don't know and you just slept with?"

Luffy stared blankly; watching as Zoro finally cracked under the nights and day's events. "Shouldn't you, I don't know, be more aggressive or something?"

"Why would I be?"

Zoro wanted to pound his head into the wall, repeatedly. Was this kid really so dense? Couldn't he see what was wrong here? Zoro was a man known not to get worked up easily, but damn it, if not sleeping with a man and having to question that, yes, you do indeed like men, and yes, this might change the course of your whole entire life he deserved a little work up here!

But Luffy was just looking at him in wonder. Wonder and a bit of confusion, and something seemed to click.

This was an Okama house.

A house full of prostitutes that saw men come and goes every day. To Luffy this was normal. Of course he wouldn't be getting worked up about it; he probably had enough regulars coming in that it didn't really matter.

"Sorry," Zoro apologized, settling down a little. "Sorry, this is probably normal for you. You see guys come and go all the time so one little night's stand isn't really a big thing to you."

There was nothing but silence and Zoro had to look up to make sure Luffy was still in the room. He was, but somewhat more confused than Zoro thought he would be.

"What?"

Zoro let out a sigh that sounded more like a laugh. Exasperated and very very tired. "Look, there's nothing wrong with being a prostitute and all, but to me this is really weird to be having tea with someone I just slept with and thought to never see again."

"Well yeah, but that's not what I'm getting at," He looked at Zoro curiously. "I'm not a prostitute, though."

Zoro's head snapped up, unsure he heard right. "What?"

"Yeah, I'm just a chore boy here."

"What?"

"Actually, now I think about it, you're the first person I slept with. Also, I forgot to get that 100 Beri off of you too."

This was a bad joke. Some horrible, horrible joke played on him by some asshole who had eyes set on his soul, and would torment him till he finally gave it and told the bastard to go ahead and have it!

Somewhere someone was laughing.

And that someone was Zoro.


End file.
